Dear Don;

Your crappy blogs, (Sorry, "Harbor Dogs' Stories") sound exactly like Auggie's crappy blogs (Sorry, "Harbor Dogs' Stories"). I accuse you of intellectual laziness.

I challenge you to a duel at a location of your choosing.

--Signed,
Johnny Bologna

Dear John;
I did not rise up from the pustulent froth of sobriety to engage some common churl lacking verisimilitude and rigor in their wanton potshots at me and my defenseless 12-year-old senior dog.

As you stated, the accused gentleman retains the prerogative to choose both the weapons and the location of the duel. I shall choose Bushmills Whiskey as the weapon, and this Fire Ant Hill just outside Urethra, Arkansas as the location.

Now read my latest Blog (Harbor Story) regarding the worst dog owners to invade my otherwise peaceful shop before I really lose my temper.

So get yourself a cup of hot chocolate or knock back a crystal champagne flute of pure Wiscasset Pond Scum and click on "Retailer's Anonymous" -by Don.

Go to the proverbial horses mouth and read our similarly surly Newsletter: https://mailchi.mp/twosaltydogs/the-salty-paws-august-2023-7226100

Sign up or forever hold your peas: https://us8.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=0e5740287c6b4fe45247c8351&id=315369d469